MOTHERS DAY

Day 3.
While in California I celebrated my seventh official Mother's Day. In honor of the big day, here are seven things I LOVE about being a mother.
1. When my children call for me. When we were struggling with infertility, I ached to hear someone call me mama. Each of my children has their own unique way to address me or call for me. When Cameron was a brand new baby, his cry went just like this "MAAAAAAAAAM! MAAAAAAAM!" Now he just says "MOM!" Ewan will often say (in a pathetically sweet voice) "Mommy, I want you." When we were at my mom and dad's, no matter where I went in the house, I could often here Heather calling "Mooommmy! Where are you?" It is a privilege to be called mother.

2. Smoochies. In all varieties. You know when they are infants and they do that slobbery open mouth kiss? Love it. Ewan likes to give me a rapid succession of pucker lipped kisses. Cameron likes to blow me a kiss from the top bunk at bed time. Heather's smoochies are always accompanied by the sound "Mmmwa!" Not all families are kissing families, but I am definitely a smoochy kind of mom and I want all I can get before they are too big to want to give them to me.
3. Discovering who they are. Anyone who really knows me, knows I LOVE to analyze people/situations. When I was acting a lot, it was my favorite part...analyzing my character. Discovering my children's needs, challenges, loves, and unique personalities is fascinating for me. I love them each so much and knowing them as the individuals that they are gives me great joy.

4.Being my own boss. There is not an OUNCE of me that would rather be getting up every morning, dropping them off somewhere, and punching in to a time clock to work for someone else. I love being in charge. I plan the day. I set the schedule. I make the goals. I stay in my pajamas all day if I need to. Motherhood is a dream for control freaks like me :) Seriously. I set the tone for our home, and it is a responsibility I take very seriously. I love my job.
5. Dressing my kids in matching clothes. I like to think of it as my little "sickness." I just love to see them all in coordinating outfits, or color coordinated shirts...It relaxes me. I know it's neurotic, but it's me! Sometimes even on days when we don't leave the house, the kids will be all matchy-matchy. My friends and family love to tease me. My friend Heather has even called when she was planning on going out with us somewhere to see what color we are wearing so she can match! So funny. (Did you notice in the pictures above that Heather and I had matching outfits for Mother's Day this year?)

6. Starting over. When Cameron was born I thought my heart would literally explode I loved him so much. I didn't know that depth of love could begin in a single moment. I was surprised to feel that same sweet feeling in the hospital when I delivered our little Connor when I was only 17 weeks pregnant. Of course Ewan stole my heart in the same way. Heather came along, and of course so did the love. This new baby was not planned, but oh, how exciting it is to be starting over again! Putting up the crib...washing tiny little socks...those itty bitty new born diapers...I just can't wait! I am so thankful that God had a different plan for us than we had for ourselves.

7. Evan is the Father. How could I have known six years ago when they put that tiny baby in his arms and he looked like he was going to pass out, what a father he would turn out to be. He has grown more confident with each addition to our family and the same gentle kindness that made me fall in love with him makes for such a great Daddy. I have heard that so many father's of kids with Autism just shut down and never do accept or deal with the news. Evan has read everything he can get his hands on. He wants to know every detail of Cameron's therapy sessions. He is so aware of the kids needs and will often notice that one of them needs some extra attention and take them on an outing just the two of them. He has sacrificed so much to make it through school to provide for us and allow me to stay at home and be the mom I want to be. I am so grateful to be the mom, with him as the dad.

CALIFORNIA ADVENTURE!

Day 1.
The fun began right away! Our first morning in LA, we headed for California Adventure Park.

Partly in preparation for the new baby, partly because we needed an upgrade, I splurged on a new stroller for the trip. A Baby Trend Sit and Stand. LOVE IT! It was perfect for a day of in and out, on and off...

Nanny and Cameron on the Tram to the park...

The first ride we had to do. Soarin' over California. Papa with the boys.

Cameron LOVED this ride. Ewan (true to form) was "stared of dat wide."

My kids love the movie "Bugs Life" so they loved the "Bugs Land" at California Adventure park.

Heather on the Lady bug ride.
I have sooo many pictures of my mom and I taking pictures of each other. We're both camera happy, I guess.
Ewan was so FUNNY on these bumper beetles! He busted a gut every time he crashed into someone. This is him about to crash into his mom.

"I stared of dis wide!"
Another favorite video at our house (we have lots since we turned our cable off). As Ewan calls it... "Monsters Ank."

"I totally love you, Mom." -he whispered in my ear. It doesn't get any better than that!
My little adventurers. What fun we had!

HIT THE ROAD JACK!

So I have been away for a while...literally! I took my three sweet babies on our first Evan-less road trip! Two days down...two days back...and six action packed days in So. California with Nanny and Papa! I have so much to write about, but I'm going to try to do in in instalments. So, for my first installment...

THE ROAD TRIP!

Thank goodness for DVD players! Cameron sat by the cooler and handed out drinks. I had the snacks by me in the front and handed them back...we stopped to switch the movies every couple of hours and it was a pretty smooth trip considering!One of my goals was to ENJOY THE RIDE, so we took what ever time we needed to stretch and play. Road side rests were a big hit...they collected sticks and had sword fights to get out some of their energy.Cameron had to pick some wild daisies. (that's our van)He said "I'm sorry mom, I just couldn't' wait until Mother's Day. I had to pick you a bouquet."

(could a Mother just die!)Hooray! The hotel we booked on Priceline had an out door pool. What a great way to end the day!I splurged and had pizza delivered to our room and called it a pizza party. Ewan got up after he finished his and said "Dat was da bestest party of all time!"They got to watch one movie before bed.Heather still thinks she needs a bottle to sleep. Evan thinks it's ridiculous, but I figure as long as it's just water, what can it hurt, right :) Is this sooo cute? My exhausted boys cuddled up together in bed.
We hit a heat wave on the way home and it was between 100 and 106 degrees all day on both days. It was already over 90 in the shade when we left our hotel at 9:00am. It was 103 in Portland at 5:30 when we got home! The heat really wiped us out!

It may sound crazy, but I am really proud of myself for being brave enough to take that long of a trip with out my sweet husband/navigator/chauffeur. It really turned out so well and I am so glad we did it! (more details to come!)

I love little boys...

Evan took the kids for a walk this morning (his first day off in about a month) and my boys brought me home pockets full of "flowers." They were all squished and wilted and Cameron said "Are they beautiful? Do you want to smell this yellow one? Does it smell good?" Ewan said "I pick flowers for you too mommy!"

I couldn't help but think..."Dear Mother, all flowers remind me of you", one of my favorite primary songs as a child...

Lucky BOY!

After lots and lots of extra chores Cameron finally earned enough money to go to Hallmark and get a new WEBKINZ. Just his luck, they were having a special..."Buy one Get one FREE!"Meet Brownie the Pinto and Tom the Cat.

Let me introduce you to the new obession!

WEBKINZ!

Cuddly, adoptable, animal friends that have a virtual life on line where you can take care of them.

Furball the Lab, Sticky and Herman the Tree Frogs, Thomas the Frog, Peekaboo the Elephant and Funny the Gorilla.

People on the Autism Spectrum often have what are refereed to as "special interests." I heard a quote recently that said "Nurotypical people have interests that go a mile long and an inch deep. People with Aspegers have interests that go an inch long and a mile deep." From the time Cameron was 18months old, he has had one special something that occupied most of his attention. When a new special interest hits him, it is a little bit consuming...and can effect the entire family. Luckily we have turned what started as a really rough week into something great for all of us (even MOM!)

Cameron spent almost every waking moment at the start of the week, begging, crying, pacing, obsessing about when he was going to go to the store and get another WEBKINZ for his collection. With some great advice and a little ingenuity, we turned it around.

We made a chart for Cameron to show exactly what jobs he could do and how much he could earn per job. We mapped out how much he already had saved and how much he needed and then we scheduled a day on the calendar as "WEBKINZ Day" (or in other words, a day you can go to the store and get a new WEBKINZ if you have earned it.) Organization and predictability like this are the key to a happy Cameron. Not only did it work like a charm, my younger children thought it was just the cool thing to do to help mom clean the house!

Please excuse me while I brag!

We just had Cameron's yearly IEP meeting. For those of you who don't know, an IEP (individualized education plan) is a legal document drawn up by a team of people at a child's school. It basically states what accommodations and services the school must provide in order to assist a student with special needs. It also lists goals that are specific to the challenges and abilities of that student.

It can be a daunting meeting if those involved don't "get" your child or are reluctant to put services in writing and then be legally bound to provide those services. Ours was a RAGING success! Everyone there who knows Cameron, just raved and raved about his progress, and what a special little boy he is. They also came prepared to word his IEP so that he will get the maximum benefit and have all of the accommodations he needs in order to be successful. I was THRILLED.

But now to the good part...Both his teacher and the school Occupational Therapist went on and on about what they love most about Cameron is his "extraordinary compassion and empathy for his classmates."

Let me explain why this is so significant. I take no credit for his compassion. He came to this earth with a deep love and concern for others. But what he did not come with was an ability to empathise. This has been the challenge we have addressed the most at home. For example: We have had to literally teach Cameron what "sad" looks like. "Do you see that they (the person he just pushed) are crying? When they are crying, they are sad. Do you remember how you felt when you fell down and you were crying? That is how they are feeling right now." We have taught this same principle in a million different ways a million different times in the past two years.

When he was younger and at church or at a play group or at someones house, he would bite, body slam, punch, push, or a combination of all of these with total detachment. He didn't seem to see the other children. He only saw himself and what he wanted. It was an extremely difficult time for our family. We tried all sorts of discipline techniques with no change. Then he was diagnosed and we understood just how much he needed to be taught things that most of us know instinctively, and we totally changed our approach.

To be honest, this has been a tremendous challenge. We have had some really low times. I have felt embarrassed by his behavior and guilty when I didn't handle it the best way...I have felt overwhelmed, and sometimes even depressed.

So it is with great joy that I brag away today! The teacher said that one of the most effective ways to motivate Cameron is to have him teach or encourage or help one of the other children. They said he can be kind and patient and accepting of the other children's challenges. I feel that this is the real Cameron, and the more we teach him, the more he is able to be his best self.

When he was younger and we were so confused about his behaviour, I remember people telling me that Heavenly Father sent him to be ours for a reason. I would secretly want to scream and say "Then why am I failing him?! Why is he struggling so much?!" When he was diagnosed, I remember thinking..."Now I know. Heavenly Father knew that I would do whatever it took to help him. He knew I was a problem solver and Evan is so accepting and together we can help Cameron's life be a miracle."

Well this was one of our first miracles and I just wanted to share.